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The Guy Who Tried To Hide His NYC Bagel From The World, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'

The Guy Who Tried To Hide His NYC Bagel From The World, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'
Lessons in why you should tell everyone where you got the bagel from, let your kids date without threatening their loved ones, know what cosplay is and think twice before writing a headline.
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Every day somebody says or does something that earns them the scorn of the internet. Here at Digg, as part of our mission to curate what the internet is talking about right now, we rounded up the main characters on Twitter from this past week and held them accountable for their actions.



This week's characters include a very old magazine that made a very big blunder, some person who has beef with cosplayers, a threatening parent who you wouldn't want to be around and a friendly fight between two influencers that got a little testy.



Sunday

Time

The character: Time, 100-year-old magazine, impulsive tweeter

After a dam in the Russian-controlled territories of Ukraine was sabotaged, its reports in the news cycle were plenty, but Time magazine stood out with its take — which has since been amended.

"How Ukraine's dam collapse could become the country's 'Chernobyl'," the title of a post they shared online read.

In case you're not aware, Chernobyl literally happened in Ukraine — which is why the Time headline is so egregious. It's baffling that a headline like that even went through, when the piece references the Chernobyl disaster itself. However, it takes just the smallest windows for people to point out the absurdities in a miscalculation like this.


The repercussion:

Ripe for jokes, some levelheaded folks did point out that the article was worth a read.


Adwait Patil



Tuesday

@LionsSpectre

The character: Anonymous Twitter user, a person oblivious about the real world

The plot: Men, have you ever been so confused by the power of make-up and Instagram filters that you think one person is actually two, meant to dupe you? Well, it happened to this poor fella, who got very upset over two images of the same person.

That's right, using make-up and arson should both be crimes. Lock all those women up for not looking pretty! How dare they.


The repercussion:

The woman in question is cosplayer and Twitch live streamer Saira Spooks who actually responded to the original tweet. But the internet did not take kindly to the facetious(?) implication that people look exactly the same.


Jared Russo



Sunday

Christy Kelly

The character: Christy Kelly, Twitter user, conservative, weirdo

The plot: We're taking a trip back several decades with this Main Character, a mother who still thinks threatening your daughter's boyfriend with a gun (or multiple guns) is normal and good. She also seems to think "my daughter's chastity is important" is not a deeply weird thing for her husband to say.


The repercussion: Aside from a few concerning individuals, the majority of people in the replies agreed that implying you would harm or shoot a child because they had consensual sex with your daughter is not OK.


Darcy Jimenez



Thursday

@Casketpaint

The character: Casketpaint, TikToker, bagel gatekeeper, bad sport

A regular guy in New York City, who influences on TikTok, posted a video of himself enjoying a bagel and then telling his viewers that he would not divulge where it was made, presumably so that no one else could enjoy it.

This is what the internet likes to call gatekeeping, and it always draws polarizing reactions. Trevor Rainbolt (a gamer and online personality) found that video and decided to teach Casketpaint a lesson. Not only did Rainbolt find the bagel (it took some time), but he got the shop to name it after himself too.


The repercussion:

Casketpaint alleges that Rainbolt, the "GeoGuessr" player who found his bagel got parts of it right, but not the ingredients. Well, whatever may be the case, the whole deal was a lighthearted affair until Casketpaint started getting threats — which by all means is unacceptable.


Adwait Patil



———

Read the previous edition of our One Main Character column, which included an unintentionally funny line about Cracker Barrel that might become a motion picture, a professor who loves Teslas because he needs to transport multiple mattresses in one go and a couple of characters who should stay away from personal finance and the dating scene.


Did we miss a main character from this week? Please send tips to [email protected].

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