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A Police Department's Laughable E-Fit Image, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'
Every day, somebody says or does something that earns them the scorn of the internet. Here at Digg, as part of our mission to curate what the internet is talking about right now, we rounded up the main characters on X from this past week and held them accountable for their actions.
Each day on twitter there is one main character. The goal is to never be it
— maple cocaine (@maplecocaine) January 3, 2019
This week, we've got Dave & Buster's getting into gambling, a journalist with a hot take on the election, Jerry Seinfeld's tired opinion on comedy and a police e-fit that's unlikely to yield any suspects.
Tuesday
Aaron Rupar
The character: Aaron Rupar, political commentator, guy who likes being yelled at
The plot: As the upcoming US presidential election inches closer, people's actions — particularly political commentators — get weirder. Aaron Rupar, now an independent journalist, hasn't hidden his affiliations online, and is often seen as a voice championing the left, and Biden, quite overtly.
I am going to spend the next 6 months getting yelled at by "leftists" for speaking bold truths like "if you don't like Trump, you should vote for Biden." This apparently makes people mad and causes them to lash out. But someone has to do it.
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) April 30, 2024
In one of his latest jabs, Rupar complained that he was going to get "yelled at by 'leftists' for speaking bold truths, like 'if you don't like Trump, you should vote for Biden.'"
"This apparently makes people mad and causes them to lash out," he wrote. "But someone has to do it."
Quite a big task for an independent journalist to undertake.
The repercussion: Rupar is no stranger to random and not-so-random netizens unloading on him in the comments, and many people have become immune to his schtick by now. This comment brought back the good old days, though, and people weren't afraid to call Rupar out for being such an obvious hack.
DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO MR BIG MEDIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
— Josh Marshall (@joshtpm) April 30, 2024
https://t.co/rcLaO8Xe0a pic.twitter.com/ki6gOI6oJa
— Michael Arria (@michaelarria) April 30, 2024
https://t.co/pYnOeXxy5J pic.twitter.com/ToVyhytVin
— derek davison (@dwdavison) April 30, 2024
Always feels cynical to frame things with "People sure are gonna get mad at me over this..." If you really believe a thing, you do it and if people get mad they get mad https://t.co/lKLYFpIIWs
— Mr. Chau (@Srirachachau) April 30, 2024
Adwait Patil
Monday
Jerry Seinfeld
The character: Jerry Seinfeld, creator of the Pop-Tart movie, wounded culture warrior
The plot: Seinfeld, now in his 70s, is coming out with a new Pop-Tarts film, and that means press tours. In a recent New Yorker interview (which Variety shared), after being asked about the "serious aspects of the world" that weighed on him, Seinfeld said "the extreme left and P.C. crap, and people worrying so much about offending other people" is hurting TV comedy.
Jerry Seinfeld says TV comedy is being hurt by "the extreme left and P.C. crap, and people worrying so much about offending other people."
— Variety (@Variety) April 29, 2024
“It used to be, you would go home at the end of the day, most people would go, ‘Oh, “Cheers” is on. Oh, “MASH” is on. Oh, “Mary Tyler Moore”… pic.twitter.com/IvHYO48CGp
"The audience polices us," he added.
The repercussion: After having gotten an estimated $14 million budget to make a Pop-Tarts movie for Netflix, many fans were wondering why the super popular comedian would even bother wading into the cancel culture discourse. Others, meanwhile, weren't so kind.
Probably. https://t.co/MosZE6EmcJ pic.twitter.com/lxHSXq7AKI
— Rob McElhenney (@RMcElhenney) April 30, 2024
Jerry Seinfeld? You mean the 38-year-old man who dated a highschooler? https://t.co/4itPNYYawe pic.twitter.com/st8bdgiiWD
— Justin T Brown (@jtbthought) April 29, 2024
My favorite extreme left PC crap pic.twitter.com/yfOnh1lNWm https://t.co/ovIJ4OlqGZ
— Phillip (@MajorPhilebrity) April 30, 2024
Julia Louis-Dreyfus seemed to be not PC and hilarious just fine. https://t.co/bG2lrYtRFC pic.twitter.com/l9Ldq0lk1H
— Sam Stryker (@sbstryker) April 29, 2024
If I was universally revered for one of the most celebrated comedies of all time, I can’t tell you how much I would just shut the fuck up and continue to be revered for the rest of my life. https://t.co/LX1X9nLMSe
— Guy Endore-Kaiser (@GuyEndoreKaiser) April 30, 2024
this is conflating two things, one of which is real:
— Ashwin Rodrigues (@shwinyo) April 29, 2024
1. aside from sports, appointment TV doesn’t really exist
2. if you date a teenager as a 39-year-old, people don’t give a shit how astute your grocery store observations are https://t.co/hjkss1CwPb
It’s sunny in Philadelphia is on season 20 ..the left didn’t stop it from being hella offensive. He crying about a monoculture fading that has nothing to do with pc or left but technology https://t.co/aiOIit0fo3
— Antoine Hardy (@Slangdini) April 29, 2024
Adwait Patil
Tuesday
Dave & Buster's
The character: Dave & Buster's, arcade-themed restaurant chain, home of sin
The plot: Not content to overcharge for mediocre burgers and lackluster arcade games, good ol' D&B is getting ready to dip its toes into gambling. Under the new plan, adults will be allowed to bet against each other while they play arcade games. Presumably, this will include the company taking a cut, but those details aren't public just yet.
Dave & Busters plans to allow players 18 year and older to gamblе on arcade games pic.twitter.com/zGzjMUywCA
— Dexerto (@Dexerto) April 30, 2024
The repercussion: Setting aside the moral arguments against this decision, the chain's plan is not exceptionally well thought out. If the idea is that people are wagering small stakes on arcade games, cash or Venmo seem like the smart option for normies who aren't deep into the D&B ecosystem.
Me watching a bunch of 12 year olds playing Skee Ball https://t.co/YKMm1yddJZ pic.twitter.com/VguZfVUEF6
— I Think You Should Parent 💦🥩 (@ITYSLKids) May 1, 2024
“Tone, we’re making a killing at Dave & Busters tonight. There’s a kid down here who’s must be the Wayne fuckin’ Gretzky of air hockey, this prick don’t lose, T. I’ve been gettin’ action on his games all night, it’s a sure fuckin’ thing hehehe” https://t.co/Rrf06TNO5b pic.twitter.com/UYaxuWizS9
— Sopranos World (@SopranosWorld) May 1, 2024
Ruining an 11 year old’s birthday because I just lost 4k and can’t stop sobbing in the Halo Fireteam Raven booth https://t.co/IZHd1c2Q47
— redux (@lycragun) May 1, 2024
me watching the parlay i put on the 10 year old playing air hockey not hit https://t.co/rkWKRlmmJx pic.twitter.com/zqDxdC9rTo
— conner (interim tony khan) (@winterweather) April 30, 2024
Dave & Busters bookies seeing college kids walking out the front door before squaring up on their air hockey parlay that didn't hit.
— The Wealth Dad (@thewealthdad) April 30, 2024
pic.twitter.com/vRXJFRBLUm
Then they better hire more security
— Nine (@NINEEEv) April 30, 2024
Dave and busters ain’t gonna be fun anymore if people raging behind you cuz they lost bread💀
— Pro (Open For Badge Grinding) (@Prolificary) April 30, 2024
Grant Brunner
Monday
Kent Police
The character: Kent Police's e-fit artist, natural born talent
The plot: This week, the X account for UK's Kent Police shared an computer-generated e-fit image based on a description of a burglary suspect.
Investigators have released a computer generated image of a man they would like to identify in connection with a burglary in Tunbridge Wells. https://t.co/hPrbjaLeyU pic.twitter.com/D35VA8TfQd
— Kent Police TWells (@KentPoliceTWell) April 29, 2024
The repercussion: The resulting portrait looks like no single human on earth — but he does, as several users have pointed out, bear a strong resemblance to a Mii from Nintendo Wii — and people wasted no time poking fun at the police department's subpar artistry.
Have you tried here mate https://t.co/NYMwPRtULx pic.twitter.com/VTzwVmNIuj
— Luke (@Lukedutchh) April 30, 2024
did he burglarize the Wii bowling alley https://t.co/cgzY8QSxTR
— Matt Margolis (@ItsMattsLaw) April 29, 2024
He’s hiding in the Facility level in GoldenEye https://t.co/R1Cm5bGvlg
— Chase Mitchell (@ChaseMit) April 29, 2024
https://t.co/sD4l5JUGuR pic.twitter.com/dAojGQak9Z
— 24hourpizzapiepower (@chucklnut) April 30, 2024
Photo of his coworkers pic.twitter.com/DzStXvGG7O
— Havoc (@ProjektHavoc) April 29, 2024
The resemblance is uncanny. pic.twitter.com/3CQvezaQql
— Freely Ashley (@TheFreelyAshley) April 30, 2024
https://t.co/5VU9DU4Xjj pic.twitter.com/fnS6t5YDeJ
— folu (@notfolu) April 30, 2024
This could be anyone https://t.co/Rga5T3LQoy
— JOAT (@JOATUK99) April 30, 2024
every member of animal collective merged together https://t.co/hzn18sxedb
— Fritz Pape (@fritzpape) April 29, 2024
ain’t no way Guest Mii A would do all that https://t.co/0J3z9BgUNw
— harthur (@fakeHARTHUR) April 29, 2024
Darcy Jimenez
Read the previous edition of our One Main Character column, which featured an unfortunate UK-US translation, a horribly unfunny joke about Taylor Swift fans, a bad take from a Columbia professor and president Biden fluffing his lines.