it's family time
My Spouse Ruined My Life When I Had Just One Semester Left, And Other Family Drama Stories
Remember those feel-good movie characters from the aughts who'd one day find a troubled family and teach them how to love again? Well, none of them were available, so I'll have to do.
That's right, I've gathered some of the wildest family drama from across Reddit, and now you're invited to my virtual BBQ to hear it all. From failed family vacations to parents knowing when to cut the leash, I'm still here to ruin everyone's Thanksgiving, even if we're in April.
Was I Wrong For Announcing My Pregnancy At My Brother's Wedding, After He Used Mine To Propose?
My brother said he was going to propose at my wedding. I told him no. That it was a day about myself and my wife and we did not want any distractions.
My mom lost her shit. She said that he wanted family he night not see again for a while to be a part of the proposal. I said I did not give a sh—t and that if he did it I would have him kicked out.
He did it. And my mom said if I tried kicking him out she would leave too.
I just remember seething inside.
My brother got married last weekend. Instead of a welcome to the family toast I used the time to announce that we were expecting our first baby.
My mom was upset but my grandmother told her to sit down and shut up. We spent most of the reception talking to family we would not see again for a while about our coming baby.
My mom says I was an asshole for taking attention away from my brother on his wedding day. She got really mad when I reminded her that she threatened to leave my wedding if I kicked him out after he proposed. I have the screen cap of the text messages.
Getting engaged during someone else's wedding has to be the corniest thing in the world. Also, how did such a cool grandma give you such a stinker for a mom — who clearly favors your brother? I wish I could give you a time machine so you can just un-invite them both. They weren't there to celebrate you, they were both there for his proposal, so I'm with literally everyone in the comments, you are not in the wrong here. Read the rest of the thread here.
My Disabled Daughter Got A Full Scholarship To One Of Her Top Colleges And She's Terrified
My daughter's college award letters are slowly rolling in and she just received almost a full ride to a local private college. Prior to this we were settling for the Community College because I did not anticipate on getting any scholarships, so my daughter was preparing to accept this school as her choice. Let me add that my daughter has been on an IEP all of her life and has a slight development delay, but despite she has managed to obtain straight A's all through her school requiring very little interventions. My husband and I are encouraging her to attend the University since our share is only slightly above what we have to pay for the community college. We are encouraging our daughter to accept this offer, and she just had a complete breakdown, crying saying she is going to get bullied, and she doesn't think this will be a good fit. I am not sure how to handle this, I think the school will give her a greater independence. I am trying to convince her to take some risks. She seems to be terrified at this decision and prefers to come home every day. But this means that I would have to drive her back and forth to the community college because she doesn't have a license yet. Are we being too hard on her?
Congratulations to your daughter and her acceptance letters. It's a very exciting time, but as you know, a very terrifying moment as well for any young person. I really agree with the comments saying she is feeling overwhelmed by the fact that this next chapter of her life will be starting soon. In some ways, it does sound like she almost wants to keep things exactly the same, like they were during high school. A friend once told me about frightening situations: instead of being scared, I should think about how fun it would be instead. Rather, than worrying she might find people who won't ever understand her, let her know there's so many new friends that she will carry with her for a lifetime, just waiting to meet her, just needing her say yes to this big change first. Read the rest of the thread here.
My Husband Ruined Our Lives And Now I Live In My Toxic Family's Basement With Our Newborn
My husband who was a student working on his doctorate in psychology got kicked out of school due to having an affair with one of his patients. He is working some minimum wage job while having a quarter of a million dollars in student loans. He was due to graduate in August and we were finally going to live above the poverty line. We were also trying for another baby. (We already have one) because we knew by august he would be done. I am also a student getting my masters in social work and I have 1 year left of school. I have left him. I am living in my families basement with my 1 year old son. Living with my family is extremely toxic and takes a massive toll on my mental health not to mention trying to process all of what just happened. I also might have to quit school now because I can not afford to not get paid for a year when I have to now be the sole provider for my son. I fucking hate my life
Edit: for those who can’t read: I LEFT HIM. We are not together. We were also trying for a baby. Past tense. This was before I found out about the affair. Also part of me going back to school involves a full time unpaid internship as well as a full course load of classes.
I think you need to listen to the commenters (I cried reading them) and finish your degree, you're almost there. They gave a lot of advice to skim through, but I going to your university for help is a solid idea. Check for campus volunteer groups that help single mothers. There's a great story in the comments that I'll close with: u/HappinessSuitsYou said that 22 years ago they almost quit nursing school with just one semester left because of an abusive husband whom they had a newborn with. However, u/HappinessSuitsYou didn't quit and said it was the best decision they made. "Do not quit, do everything you can to finish up because it'll carry you for the rest of your working life." Read the rest of the thread here.
My Husband's Affair Daughter Now Lives With Us And My Husband Is Refusing To Help
My (34F) life is falling apart and it's all thanks to my husband. We had a perfect life, both of us worked in the jobs we loved, we have a beautiful daughter (10F) and a healthy son (5M). When I was pregnant with our son we both almost died due to complications. So before the birth and even afterwards I didn't want to have sex, why would I? I almost died and my body was in pain for months afterwards even with strong medication. I thought my husband understood because he never pushed me for sex or even asked. I thought it was because he understood my pain, but apparently he was just getting it from somewhere else. A few months ago we were visited by Child Protective Services, I was terrified at first frantically thinking of what we did wrong with our children to cause a visit. But no, as it turns out some woman I've never met before died in a car accident leaving behind a daughter, and my husband's name was on the girl's birth certificate and he was named in the woman's will as the father. I thought it was a mistake at first, until my husband told me the truth. As it turns out while I was suffering my pregnancy and the after effects of almost dying, my husband would go to a woman he knew at work and get it off with her. He said this as if he did me a favor. Well as the CPS worker explained to us, my husband is her closest living relative that can care for her. The woman's family apparently wanted nothing to do with the poor little girl. When she asked us if we wanted to take her in I said yes. Yes I know this might be the true cause of all my issues, but my husband pawned that poor girl off to live with her single mother for five years, he doesn't get to pawn her away when she needs help. She's his responsibility, and now is ours. I told him I'll help take care of the necessary visits for wellness checks and help with whatever CPS wants us to do. All he had to do was explain everything to our children. The fact I'm saying this tells you what he did. Yes, nothing. We had to clean out a room and buy new furniture and even looked for some toys, our children go to a private school so I picked up some more work hours in order to be able to afford her tuition, I was the one who had to tell our extended families the big change because he didn't want to do so. I did almost all the heavy lifting. So color me shocked when his daughter finally joins our family two weeks ago and the first words out of our children's mouths was "who's that?" Yes, I was the one who had to tell our children's school, extended families, family doctors, and my workplace about my husband's affair and subsequent addition to our family. But he couldn't tell our children being he was "too ashamed" to face them. So guess who was the one who had to explain that they have a sister now as I'm trying to settle the poor girl into her new home and room? And shocker, our children didn't take the news well as it was happening right in front of them. My daughter was screaming while crying causing my son and the little girl to cry. A situation that could have been avoided if my husband just did the one thing I asked of him and explained everything to them much sooner. It's been two weeks of her living with us and the situation hasn't improved. My husband has not picked up the slack that comes with having a new addition to the family so we're struggling right now to make ends meet, I feel embarrassed bringing all three children around for appointments and groceries because the little girl is very much obviously not mine and I can tell people are judging our family, my daughter is much moodier and less happy and refuses to even acknowledge our newest addition to the family, our son doesn't really understand what is going on and it's causing even him to lash out. And I don't even know how to help the poor little girl because I know that if I feel like my life is falling apart, she must feel even worst. I suggested family therapy, therapy for our children, even just marriage therapy so we can hopefully move past this and work together as a unit for all the children. He's refused everything, saying that he knows he'll be lectured by everyone when all he was doing was trying to help me. I just don't know how to fix this, please help me. I don't want to divorce him because I just know that will make it worst for the kids, but that's the only option my family is telling me. Meanwhile his family is begging me to make this work and to just... look past it.
Thank you, I hear you all loud and clear. Will be looking into therapy for me and the children and hopefully a good divorce lawyer. But first I need to get some answers because some of you are raising some good points.
First off, I think I speak for everyone when I say this little girl is really lucky to have you, as are your two other children. I agree with the comments, focus on family therapy for them first, and then approach divorce potentially. Put my foot down about working overtime if he's not going to help with the kids, then he maybe he can at the very least help with the finances. Try to find someone as your confidante, because unfortunately, you are very much alone in this situation when a partner refuses to accept their responsibilities. Read the rest of the thread here.
Read the previous edition here.
[Image credit: Dziana Hasanbekava]